Your last screen shot is from the Attribute on the LAYOUT view - this can't be modified and should only be showing as date.
If you push the virtual to the LIST view, then you have the option to show date/time.
Is it on the List or Edit view that is displaying the date/time?
What is the attribute on the Project you have created the virtual field for? Several PPM clients I have like to have the project start/finish dates on the Status Report edit screens, and these are showing as just dates on the Edit views of the Status Report.
In relation to your question about the look-up display, the look-up needs to be configured to include the Resource Name, and to use this as the Display Attribute. Have a look at the OOTB lookup Active Resources - LOOKUP_USER_ACTIVE_SEC
(which should be read-only and you can't modify this one),navigate to the parent window and you will see the Display Attribute is set to full_name. What look-up have you used for the sub-object to link to the resource? If it is a custom look-up, then you should be able to modify it to include the Resource Name and use this as the Display attribute for the lookup.